Growing up, my mom always made sure to teach me about how God made my body as a woman. From cycles to anatomy to moral theology, my mom was my first and best teacher. For this I am grateful. Without the foundation of truth that she exposed me to as a young girl, I may not have been as open to exploring various methods of cycle tracking and NFP, and my marriage may not have turned out to be the invaluable gift that it has been in my life. Combining this foundation of truth with my interest in human anatomy and physiology set me on a trajectory I didn’t see coming- and I’m all the better for it.
When I started my studies at Franciscan University of Steubenville in 2011, I knew from the start that I wanted to pursue a career in nursing. “Maybe I’ll be a pediatric nurse or a labor and delivery nurse,” I thought. Although these are good and noble desires, God had something else planned for my life. I graduated in 2015, still planning to land a nursing job on some exciting unit in a hospital in Chicago. When I began my first job at a small hospital on their ambulatory surgery floor, I said to myself, “I’ll do this for a year or so, then I can switch to my dream job!”
As you might have guessed, I was on that ambulatory surgery floor longer than a year. I ended up staying for about five years. When I was pregnant with my third child, I was feeling worn-out and needed a break. My husband supported me in my decision to take a step back and focus on being a stay-at-home mom. At the time, I thought this was where my nursing career would end, at least for the time being. I wanted to focus on my children and, admittedly, I was excited to leave the pressure of being a working-mom behind. After only about a year into my early “retirement”, I felt the nudge from God to get certified to teach the Marquette Method of NFP. I had been practicing Marquette in my own marriage for about two years at that time, and I felt like God was calling me to share my knowledge with other couples.
Reflecting on my journey with NFP, I can recognize a maturing and re-shaping that occurred over a period of several years. When I first heard the term Natural Family Planning as a high school student, I understood it to be for the sole purpose of avoiding or achieving pregnancy. I held that understanding for over a decade. However, as my faith began to deepen, and I began to learn more about women’s health and theology of the body (that is, the theology and philosophy of human sexuality and married love), I began to see NFP as more than just a means to space pregnancies. It became a tool that I could use to better understand how God made me and the kind of love He was calling me to live out in my marriage. We had learned a sympto-thermal method after the birth of our first, but it didn’t feel like a good fit for us. I was breastfeeding throughout the night, and this made my temperature recordings inaccurate (presenting in a saw-tooth pattern). It made that specific method feel stressful for me, so we switched to the Marquette Method, focusing more on hormones and less on temperature. The flexibility of the Marquette Method took away the anxiety, and I became very confident in tracking my cycles. Because of this confidence, I started the process to become certified to teach the Marquette Method. As I began coaching couples in NFP, I also started to see how the method can be used to help discover hormonal issues as well as point to overall health and wellness of women.
I founded Simply NFP at the end of 2021, and it has been a huge blessing in my life. In the beginning, I thought my NFP coaching would be simply that: teaching couples to track their cycles using the Marquette Method. I quickly found out that it would become so much more than just that. I began to see the serious need for supporting these couples who have chosen the path of NFP. Many of them were longing for truth. While they did recognize that truth when they saw it, they needed support choosing it and staying on the path. I’ve made it my mission to be that support for couples. This has been the most fulfilling part of being an NFP instructor. I get the unique honor and privilege to walk with these couples and help them on the path. From chart-checks to chats about moral theology, I love being available to couples who need a little extra support and encouragement because let’s face it- we don’t have to do hard things alone!
The process of teaching and walking with couples as they navigate NFP and cycle tracking has deeply impacted my own marriage in all the best ways. My husband and I have been able to embrace NFP for what it is: a beautiful sacrifice that respects both of us. Although times of abstinence during my fertile window can be tough and frustrating, we have been able to communicate effectively, and it has made the times when we are able to be intimate that much better because of it.
Being a Marquette instructor has also given me the gift of perspective. While periodic abstinence can be difficult, there is no better alternative, and the positives of fertility awareness outweigh the negatives. I have coached many couples who have stopped taking hormonal contraceptives (hormonal birth control, IUD, etc.). The stories I have heard about the side effects of artificial birth control as well as the moral implications involved are more of a testament to why hormonal birth control is just not worth it. Combine that with the ways that NFP can help lead to diagnosis and treatment of hormonal issues and cycle problems, and NFP is clearly the best choice.
I want to encourage anyone who is on the fence about NFP to give it a try. If you approach it with an open mind, you will start to see how working together with your spouse through charting your cycle will bring you closer as a couple, and your marriage will reap all the benefits. The ways that men and women give and receive love (even in the marital embrace) speak truth about how God made us and how He calls us to give and receive love in every aspect of our lives. Even having the knowledge of your cycle health and having a natural way to avoid or achieve pregnancy are enough reasons to take the leap and learn a method. There are many resources available that can help you on your journey- you are not alone!
